“Tonight we’re going to give what his parents and the legal system should have done years ago,” host Kevin Hart said. “We’re going to give this boy an ass-whoopin.’”
“Ebola patients hear about ‘Bieber fever’ and say, ‘I’m gonna go ahead and ride this one out.’”
“Selena Gomez wanted to be here, but she’s dating men now,” comedian Jeff Ross joked.
“Is it true you dumped her because she grew a mustache before you?”
The #BieberRoast will include guest roasters Snoop Dogg, Shaquille O’Neal, Martha Stewart, Hannibal Buress, Ludacris, Chris D’elia, and Comedy Central regulars Natasha Leggero and Jeffrey Ross. The most peculiar name on the list is, of course, Martha Stewart. It’s unclear why the biggest name in the homemaker business will be throwing jabs and Bieber, but we can’t wait to see what kind fresh baked jokes she’s whipped up.